Just one of those stories

For me, reading the newspaper has become like conducting surgery, especially in the past few years. Even on the Internet, some stories are becoming so blatantly opinionated that you need to read the same story from four or five different sources just to get an even-Steven look at whatever it is they're trying to write about. Sometimes, the stupidity of the author is only out done by the stupidity of the person whom the story is being written about.

Rarely do these two forces of stupidity unify to produce a piece of functionally idiotic journalism that is so idiotic, that no matter how hard you try, there is literally no way that you will come away from the story NOT retarded.

I stumbled across an interesting story on the front page of Mass Live today which can be found here. When people talk about stupidity in the media, all you have to do is look at a story like this for 'proof'. Not only is the headline entirely misleading, but some of the content is flat out laughable. Sure, you can follow the link but I'd much rather put this on display for you to take a look at.

Hagel: Some see impeachment as option

Yes, as you can tell, this is going to be one of those stories that glorified the only Republican with 'common sense'. The guy who made an announcement that he had no announcement last week, GOP media whore & Nebraska Senator Chuck Hagel.

WASHINGTON (AP) — With his go-it-alone approach on Iraq, President Bush is flouting Congress and the public, so angering lawmakers that some consider impeachment an option over his war policy, a senator from Bush's own party said Sunday.

"Go it alone"? That's sooo 2003. The president is 'flouting' Congress and the public, and because he's such a completely miserable prick, he's got people so steaming mad that even members of his own party are considering impeachment in congress, which is an absolutely absurd claim.

Meanwhile, the Senate's No. 2 Republican leader harshly criticized House Democrats for setting an "artificial date" for withdrawing troops from Iraq and said he believes Republicans have enough votes to prevent passage of a similar bill in the Senate.

"We need to put that kind of decision in the hands of our commanders who are there on the ground with the men and women," said Sen. Trent Lott, R-Miss. "For Congress to impose an artificial date of any kind is totally irresponsible."

So now we're three paragraphs deep, and not one mention of impeachment or Chuck Hagel. Just some good old fun-making of Republicans before ripping the Trent Lott Monster out of the closet to scare the kool-aid drinkers.

GOP Sen. Chuck Hagel of Nebraska, a member of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee and a frequent critic of the war, stopped short of calling for Bush's impeachment. But he made clear that some lawmakers viewed that as an option should Bush choose to push ahead despite public sentiment against the war.

"Any president who says, I don't care, or I will not respond to what the people of this country are saying about Iraq or anything else, or I don't care what the Congress does, I am going to proceed — if a president really believes that, then there are — what I was pointing out, there are ways to deal with that," said Hagel, who is considering a 2008 presidential run.

OH there he is! Hagel's so good at making the lefty media swoon for him.

I'm a big fan of pro wrestling. Before you laugh, consider how close to politics the two really are. Wrestlers are just like politicians except wrestlers usually don't try to portray themselves as seriously. One of the cardinal rules of wrestling is to never give the fans too much. Always give them a reason to tune in next week. If two guys are feuding and come into physical contact with each other before the scheduled match is supposed to happen, there's no reason to watch the match. Same thing with politics. Always give the media a reason to come back to hear the rest of whatever you don't have to to say. No one does this better than Chuck Hagel, the same guy, as I already mentioned, who called a press conference to let everyone know he was making an announcement that he didn't have an announcement yet.

That ticked the media off, the one group whose support he had been cultivating for years. I'm sure this is a nice way to get some attention. Just like Bill Richardson likened a fence on the Mexican boarder to the Berlin Wall last week, Hagel's going to say, or at least imply, something crazy enough to hopefully get the media's attention. Welcome to the totally pathetic world of wanna-be Presidential campaigns.

That comes after the House narrowly passed a bill Friday that would pay for wars in Iraq and Afghanistan this year but would require that combat troops come home from Iraq before September 2008 — or earlier if the Iraqi government did not meet certain requirements.

On Sunday, Hagel said he was bothered by Bush's apparent disregard of congressional sentiment on Iraq, such as his decision to send additional troops. He said lawmakers now stood ready to stand up to the president when necessary.

Nice of our author to leave out the hundreds of millions of dollars in pork barrel spending the Democrats pig piled into the bill. Almost every major newspaper in the nation crucified the bill, including some of the more liberal ones. The Lowell Sun even went as far as to call the bill 'treasonous'. But 'both sides' isn't useful when you're trying to get a point across.

The second paragraph is more of that sexy wording. Bush's "apparent" disregard, as if his acting in what he feels is the best interests of the country is somehow being taken for downright contempt for the entire legislative branch of Government.

In the April edition of Esquire magazine, Hagel described Bush as someone who doesn't believe he's accountable to anyone. "He's not accountable anymore, which isn't totally true. You can impeach him, and before this is over, you might see calls for his impeachment. I don't know. It depends on how this goes," Hagel told the magazine.

Someone tell me what Hagel means by "He's Not accountable anymore, which isn't totally true." That's Chuck-N-Cluck for what again?

Look, I make no secret of the fact that I'm no fan of the Democratic Party and it's politics. But my loathing for their antics pales in comparison to my raging hatred for political grandstanding on the left or the right. Chuck Hagel frequently gets in front of TV cameras to say a whole lot without really saying anything at all. He'll say anything, including saying nothing, to get the media's attention and make himself the center of the show.

"We have clearly a situation where the president has lost the confidence of the American people in his war effort," Hagel said. "It is now time, going into the fifth year of that effort, for the Congress to step forward and be part of setting some boundaries and some conditions as to our involvement."

Wait who has a disregard for the Democratic process? The legislature or the executive branch? Sounds like both to me.

"This is not a monarchy," he added, referring to the possibility that some lawmakers may seek impeachment. "There are ways to deal with it. And I would hope the president understands that."

Now, we're making outrageous statements and following them up with threats. Someone get the hook.

So what's the point of this whole thing, well, there really isn't one other than to point out to any politicians or members of the media who are out there that it's stuff like this that makes watching and reading the news as enjoyable of taking one of those really sharp shits. Not only is there opinion plastered all through this story on the part of the author, there's enough crazy comments from Chuck Hagel to lambaste him for an entire election cycle.

The headline said Chuck Hagel said others feel impeachment is an option. I didn't hear much from others, just a whole lot from him, without, of course, saying it.